1 Year Later

Today is my sweet boy's first birthday, and to commemorate that, I thought I'd resurrect the ole' blog with a post in his honor. Finn's first year of life has been an adventure. He has transitioned through a few phases: from mild and peaceful newborn to miserable, highly sensitive infant, to happy, energetic, flirtatious, vocal little boy. All the while he has managed to make everyone he meets laugh as they watch his expressive face and body language. It has never been hard to tell what Finn is feeling! We love our Finn boy so much. Every morning we are excited to see him and start a new day with him, and we miss him after he goes to bed. He fills our hearts. At 1 year old, Finn is vivacious and has energy springing from his being at all times. His language skills are blossoming and he talks in a deep voice. He likes unrolling the toilet paper, opening cupboards and drawers and emptying them, discovering ways to make noise, watching dogs, busses, and especially the garbage truck. He enjoys eating, and feels great injustice when someone eats in front of him without sharing. He likes to grin at everyone he encounters, so he makes a lot of friends. He loves social interaction. He especially loves being with mama and papa. Perhaps this is because he has already learned just how good it feels to make someone happy.


This is the letter I wrote to my son Finn for his first birthday.

My Finn,
I am intimidated by this task because I want to be able to convey just how much I love you, and everything about you, but I know I will not do either justice. Before you were born, my life was packed full of steep athletic goals, dream vacations, trips to visit friends and family, weekly adventures with your dad, around the city and beyond. I was not content unless it was so. Since you were born, I have changed. I need less to feel fulfilled and every day I spend with you grants me satiety. My drive for the things that used to fill my life has been dulled and replaced by a simple desire to be with you, to make sure you are happy, to make sure you are safe. While these things all embellish my life, no race, earthly beauty, tasty meal, success at work, gives me the kind of spark I feel when you smile at me and I see that subtle dimple under your left eye, when you lay your head on my chest, when you squeeze your little arms around my neck or when you douse me with wet kisses. There is nothing I would choose to watch over your feet springing to action in your bouncer, the look on your face when you discover a new noise, your one raised eyebrow and smug grin when you are pleased, the studiousness with which you are learning to talk and mimic sounds. I love to hear the slapping sounds of your hands against the floor as you come to find me in a different room. When your head rounds the corner, you greet me with a beaming smile like you have discovered treasure. You are so good at showing your affection. When I am playing with you on the floor and I lay on my back and say the word "ma-ma", you acknowledge that I am "ma-ma" by laying your head sweetly on my chest for a little cuddle. It has been my greatest honor and joy to watch you become your own little person.
Ever since you were about six months old I have noticed that you seem so excited to be alive. When you wake up from your naps you smile and flap your arms and legs, so excited to be awake again.

As soon as you are out of your crib you have a searching look on your face..."what's next?" You still, since newborn age, love to stare out the windows and at lights.


You have always had distinct preferences for certain books, and these change over time. You learned to turn the pages of books if you like them, or shut them if you don't like them.




You show the same distinct taste in music. You have always responded to certain songs by becoming mesmerized, completely still and silent, focused on listening intently. Other songs you yell or babble over. You get excited when you see dogs or other animals and you try to crawl over to visit them as fast as you can.

You are very active and it is rare that you are ever sitting completely still. Your newfound ability to go where you want to, pull yourself up, climb and open things, has you going non-stop. As much as you love to eat and are eager to do so, as soon as you feel the slightest bit filled, you are rearing to go again and the desire to be exploring and/or have your hands on something brings you near tantrum. You are not a patient little man and get angry having to wait for anything that you want.





You are easily brought to giggles and you are pleased when you make us laugh. Your sense of humor is really developing right now.



You easily catch on to games we play with you and you love interacting with us this way.




You do best when you have consistency in your life and you need a lot of sleep (14-15 hours/day) in order to function as your regular, happy self.


I love that you still have that whirlpool of hair at your widow's peak that I fell in love with when you were a newborn. Unless people see you up close, they think you are still bald, because your hair is so light and it usually lays down flat and smooth on your head. We've seen the rare mussed up do and know better.

You have gotten so tall! You were consistently growing at the 50th percentile until about 9 months of age when you shot up to the 85th percentile. Now you are between 90-95th percentile. Your weight has consistently stayed close to the 50th percentile your whole life. You are now close to 23 pounds and 31.5 inches.
Ever since we got ultrasound pictures of you, up until now, everyone has declared that you look like me. I have seen strangers pointing at us and laughing, commenting on the resemblance, and my co-workers call you my clone. Your dad and I might be the only ones who see some of papa in you. At times I look at you and see myself, your Grandad Bates, or your papa, but most of the time I see my unique little boy. You look like Finn, and you are the most beautiful little human being I have ever seen, and I know your papa feels the same way.

Many nights we have to go to your room to watch you sleeping, because just a short time of not seeing you is too long. There is so much more to who you are and what you mean to me. My greatest wish is to see you continue to find happiness, to learn, and to love.
Love, Mama

(photos taken from months 8-12; at some point I plan to recap the months of his first year)